You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize