dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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