I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
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