Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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