she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize