im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize