she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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