I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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