Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
