What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
