"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
