Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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