I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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