He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?