cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
