So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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