I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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