Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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