So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
