I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
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If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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