I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
You were trust falling into bushes
Randomize
