Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
19 Movie Extras Reveal What It’s Like To Work With Celebrities
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.