Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug