the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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