I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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