If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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