Rock
Scissors
Fuck
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
A bitchslap is in order.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize