You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.