It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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