Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
