this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
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