Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
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