He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
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I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
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The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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