Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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