at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
