I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize