why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize