Well douche your snatch and let's go!
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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