God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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