So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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