I hate your face
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
