I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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