im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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