Plan B is the new Plan A
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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