so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
