Pants 0. Shit 1.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
