how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
