he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.