i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank