yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
