Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Randomize
