he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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